Friday, May 20, 2005

Why I Love My Husband

There are a lot of reasons why I love him, actually. He's considerate, kind, passionate, and darn it, he makes me weak in the knees when I kiss him, after nearly six years of marriage. But he possesses a wonderfully endearing quality: he listens to me.

This isn't just the kind of listening where he makes obligatory "yes, honey" "uh-huh" and "okay" remarks. Instead, he offers wonderful advice. Especially about my writing and my career. He told me the other day, "I just know you're going to make it. It's just a matter of time." What more could you ask for from the man who shares your life and your dreams?

Last night I talked to him about the little writing problem I'm having, in that I'm not able to actually get myself to sit down and write. I told him that I wished I was like Rene, that I could just do it (write the damn book!), but for some reason, my mind is holding me back. It's that war between the left and right sides of my brain and invariably, the left side wins more often than not. Do you know what I did last night instead of writing? I mowed the lawn. Call me crazy, but after sitting at the computer all day writing at work, I needed to get my blood moving. That's a legitimate excuse, I suppose, but writing suffers the worse for it.

At any rate, hubby and I were discussing this after the kids went to bed and we were just about ready to snooze off to dreamland ourselves. This is when we have the best conversations. His genuine interest in helping me through yet another crisis only makes me love him more. :-)

I'll be the first to admit that I think too much. Even when I'm trying to focus on one thing in particular, my mind will bounce back and forth between a host of unrelated topics. It's frustrating sometimes as it makes it difficult to stay on track. I haven't figured out the trick to overcoming this yet. But hubby offered me some answers. Finding a place in my mind to go to - whether it is an island, a mountain retreat, or anywhere of my choosing - and taking the time to clear my mind of everything but that retreat. I tried this last night, but my place of choosing was my English cottage. I put everything behind this mental wall and started walking towards my cottage. Listening to the sounds around me...birds chirping, the wind blowing through the grass...smelling the blooming flowers...and pretty soon, I was asleep!

Now I'm thinking maybe I can use this technique to clear my mind and prepare myself for writing. The trick is to get my behind in the chair!


  1. Just don't fall asleep in the chair! Hee hee. Seriously, though, staying on track is TOUGH. Especially when your mind is struggling to figure out a problem. Sometimes stopping to mow the lawn can free up your subconscious to solve a problem.

    At least, er, that's what I tell myself when I end up doing household chores instead of writing....

  2. I can come up with more excuses why not to write after working all day too! (lawn mowing wouldn't be one of them though *g )

    I do like your mind clearing exersise. Did you try it yet for your writing?

  3. Would hubby be so thrilled with his suggestion if he knew Hugh Jackman and Johnny Depp were hanging around in your "secret garden?" Oooh, that sounds really bad, in a really good sort of way.

  4. My husband is great and helps me a lot, too. He's really good at giving me THE LOOK when I'm just freaking out over my book, LOL. He makes me relax.

  5. I think too much too and it drives me nuts! It keeps me awake at night. This sounds like a great ritual...something to get you through the transition from not writing to writing. Someone suggested I find my own ritual too, like lighting a candle. Something where you tell yourself, "This is my time to write and I'm going to write." I haven't tried it yet. :)

  6. Gals, I haven't tried the technique yet. It's Friday night and guess what I did - I vacuumed my car. *rolling eyes*
    Tomorrow I hope to get lots done - and I also hope to test out the theory. :-)
    Rene, I hadn't thought of Hugh and Johnny being there, but now I am! LOL

  7. If you figure out the secret to getting your behind in the chair and sticking there, please let me know.

  8. Your husband sounds wonderful! Good luck with the BIC (butt in chair). It's a great habit to get into - it definitely pays off in the end.

  9. Jill and Kelly, I plan to practice the BIC later today - I'll let you know if I'm successful! But I must run to the university library and write a few articles for another encylopedia.
    Hubby was quite flattered with my blog about him. *grin*
    Thanks so much, everyone, for your comments. :-)

  10. Anonymous6:34 AM

    Enjoyed a lot! »


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