Sunday, July 01, 2007

Stir-Crazy

It's been a week and two days since my husband has been in the hospital. And the end isn't in sight yet. We thought Monday would be the day. But the doctor told us today that nope, it's looking more like Wednesday or Friday. We're waiting for the swelling to go down in his arm around the bicep area, where the infection appears to have originated. Otherwise, my husband is doing great. Has his appetite back, no fever, etc. He's tired of laying around, though. And to tell you the truth, I'm tired of being at the hospital!

I did take a walk yesterday afternoon - I just couldn't stand it anymore. And to my surprise, I found that William Jennings Bryan, a famous Nebraskan and actually, famous American, built a house where the hospital now stands. That house is now a museum and the hospital is named after him. I'm hoping to visit it next week. Looks like I'll have plenty of time to do so!

I'm also upset at myself for my eating habits lately. I haven't been going to Curves since I pretty much live at the hospital. I was hoping to get back to working out this week, but since hubby's still going to be hooked up to IV's and getting antibiotics, that doesn't look like it will happen. And the hospital tends to make some pretty darn good desserts. I resisted today, but haven't been the best on the other days, and I know I've already gained back a few pounds that I lost. So now I'm on a mission to eat better.

But man, it's hard. When I get stressed, I eat. It's a proven fact. I try to eat healthy - veggies and fruits, but that doesn't always happen. I've got a huge financial burden on my shoulders right now. The bank is calling demanding its money, and I'm pretty sure some of the utility companies will be calling me soon, especially the cell phone company. They all want me to go borrow money from some well-meaning, rich relative. Um, sorry, everyone I know is broke! And really, I have my pride. I am not one of those people that goes and begs others for money. Just not me.

I'm in the midst of filling out the paperwork to get some help from the Veteran's Admin. for the bills, but they don't cover past due bills. I am just hoping that everyone will work with me.

I won't lie - I had tears in my eyes when I left the hospital today, not only for the migraine that started to creep around my temples, but also because I really don't know what we're going to do. Having no insurance and a huge hospital bill is enough, but when you add on an additional month of living with only one spouse's paycheck when you're used to living with two is not going to be easy.

I just try and comfort myself with the knowledge that God will provide. In fact, I cling to that right now.

On Writing...

Despite being a big stressed out, I have dived back into the manuscript and have had to shut the inner critic and the "you'll never sell because you suck" voice off. It's not been easy. Sometimes the words flow better than others, and I'm just going to stick to it. I need to get this manuscript sent off. I've looked at it so long that I think it all sucks. Suppose that's not too strange for those of us who do this writing gig!

9 comments:

  1. Yes, God will provide. I know He will! And all your friends are rooting for you, too.

    I love the William Jennings Bryan house. Isn't it great? When you look at old photos of it, there's nothing around--it's in the middle of the country. Hehe... quite a change from now, huh?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ugh - what a tough time for you!!! The one piece of advice I have is to pay the bills that are tied to things you don't want shut off, and let the others go. Pay the utilities, even though they don't call and yell at you. Credit cards will call and yell, but can't shut off the heat, so let them go for a while till you get on your feet, if you have to.

    Just about everyone has faced some sort of financial crisis. I was laid off 4 times in one year while the dot com implosion happened here. It's really tough, but you'll get through it!

    Robin

    ReplyDelete
  3. Still praying for you and your family.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Devon Ellington1:59 PM

    Hang in there. I'm thinking of you.

    Explain the situation and set up payment plans with each demander. Put it all in writing : "For the next few months, due to medical emergencies, I will pay you this much of the bill".

    Obviously, with the hospital, you'll have to set up other payments. Contact your Attorney General's office to find out what other options you have since VA says they don't pay past bills. There must be other veterans' agencies that can step in.

    Do you belong to anything like the Freelancers' Union or any other professional organization? Very often, they have emergency loan options.

    Is your husband in a union? I don't remember what he does, sorry. Most unions will also help you.

    Thinking of you.

    ReplyDelete
  5. You should contact worker's compensation for your state. In many states the employee is covered even if the employer isn't paying into it. It doesn't seem right you guys should be completely responsible for a job site injury.

    Sometimes writing gives us an escape and puts us into another place. It can relieve stress.

    I hope you can get some help from the state and the VA.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Betty - Yes, it is a beautiful house. I definitely want to go inside sometime soon!

    Robin - Fortunately, we don't have any credit cards, so that is nice. It's just the car loan that we keep getting a call from the bank on. Hubby has another car he can sell if need be, but I hope he doesn't have to - it's his project car - a convertible - and he loves driving it around and fixing it up. But I guess sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.

    Devon - I'm hoping that some of utility companies will work with me. Neither hubby or I belong to any union, but I am getting the paperwork together for the veteran's (the non-medical division) that hopefully will be able to help us out.

    MW - Thank you. I appreciate it!

    Rene - I'll check into that worker's comp thing. But I don't know if it will work since he wasn't treated for the burn on his arm. But that the staph infection was a direct result of the burn is unarguable at this point. We'll see what happens.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Oh Melissa, I hope things work out for you. I hate the thought of all those stupid hospital bills. Makes me glad our Cdn system is what it is, flaws and all. I'll keep you in my thoughts.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Your poor husband!! How horrible to be locked up in the hospital with something like that. I truly hope he's home soon and feeling much better.

    And when it comes to the writing side of things, tell that negative inner voice if it can't say something nice, saying nothing at all. You will get your work published. It's not an easy journey, but it's worth it and your turn will come.

    Hang in there on both fronts, Melissa. :)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Melissa, I am so sorry. I am thinking of you. Hang in there.

    Hope tomorrow is a good day for you...

    ReplyDelete

I love to hear from you!

New Digs

I've got a new home on the web - stop by if you get a chance! www.melissamarsh.net