I'm beginning to think I cannot follow a schedule. I can't reach the goals I set for myself, even when they're attainable. I am sick of my headaches and sick of being overweight. I know I can lose the weight, yet mentally, I'm not prepared to begin that journey.
I want to be able to sit down and write at the drop of a hat because I can't do otherwise.
And I also want to win the lottery.
Can you tell that today is one of those days? Yup. A rant day. A day where I am harder on myself than any interrogator. A day where I have time to work on my writing, time to go for a walk, time to make a plan for my life - and I don't want to.
I feel like I'm in a funk right now. My house is a disaster and it's not helped any by the kids who seem to think I am their full-time slave. I see dirt everywhere, yet feel so overwhelmed that I don't even want to think of cleaning it. Hubby cleans, but not lately. He's busy with his own projects. I feel like there is so much I need to do - lose weight, get in better shape, change my diet, finish the novel, be a mom, keep a neat house, do the bills, etc., etc., etc....maybe I am having a case of Superwoman Blues. Yup, that's right. Superwoman has landed her invisible jet and is now sulking on the couch with a pint of Ben and Jerry's Lowfat Yogurt and watching movies. Popcorn litters the floor, the dust is three inches thick, the kids haven't had their supper, and there's mud on the walls. Chaos reigns, but she flat out doesn't care.
Tomorrow is another day...
I've got a new home on the web - stop by if you get a chance! www.melissamarsh.net
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