How Life Changes...

 I haven't posted on this blog in five years.

A lot can change in five years. A LOT.

On the personal front, I got a divorce, took a few years to heal (lots of therapy!) before I started dating again, entered the dating trenches in my 40s and had some good and very bad experiences, found a wonderful man, sold my house, moved to an apartment, and then two years later, moved into another house with my boyfriend. I also decided last year to start working on my PhD in history, a decision which, it turns out, might have been not exactly wrong, but untimely. I wrote and published a nonfiction book called WWII Nebraska, and sold a novel to Simon and Schuster UK. Whew!

I did a complete 180 on my political beliefs. I'm a moderate who doesn't like the state of my country, and find far too many disturbing parallels to 1930s America regarding fascism and antisemitism. Since that is what I study for my PhD research, it is a little disconcerting to be researching something that is so relevant today.

I read through some of my old blog posts earlier today, and I am just amazed at how much better my life is now. 18 years in a toxic relationship did a number on me, and made me sick. For years, doctors diagnosed me with rheumatoid arthritis. Last year I discovered that wasn't the case at all. I made several trips to the Mayo Clinic and they diagnosed me with fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome. Because of the abuse and trauma I endured during my marriage, my brain got stuck in "fight or flight" mode, altering how my brain perceives pain. There's a whole lot more to it than that, but suffice to say that I now have lifelong illnesses largely as a result of a painful marriage. I had to make peace with that.

But since those chronic illnesses have become worse, I've transitioned to working full time from home. I'm very thankful that my job allows me to do this.

And having a partner who loves me, respects me, and treats me as his equal is incredible. No more abuse. No more fights. No more drama. At first, I wasn't used to a relationship where I wasn't crying every few days or wondering why my partner thought cruel jokes were "funny." Fodder for another blog post, I guess.

I decided to start blogging again because it is time to rediscover me, the me who loves to write fiction, who loves to immerse myself in the writing world. Once upon a time, blogging helped me focus on my writing in a way I'd not experienced before. I made such incredible friends through blogging, and most of those friendships survive to this day. I hope by resurrecting this blog that I can form new friendships, deepen my knowledge of the writing craft, and become a more prolific writer.

I'm excited for this new chapter in my life to begin.

Join me on this journey!