Sunday, December 02, 2012

It Has Begun

I didn't want to wrestle with the fake tree this year. Last year, I nearly tore my hair out just putting it all together, then arranging the branches. It is also a very large tree, so it dwarfed everything else in the living room. So last night, hubby and I went to a local store and bought a beautiful, real balsam fir tree.

Now it's a little crooked, and after we chopped off some branches to make it fit in the stand, it's also a little sparse on the right side. No matter. It was up within 30 seconds and no need to rearrange anything! It also smells wonderful.

It took me about 30 minutes or so to decorate it. I listened to Bing Crosby and Frank Sinatra singing Christmas carols, and the only major interruption I had was when my son and husband were yelling at the t.v. downstairs (they were watching college football). Otherwise, it was a peaceful decorating experience.

I think it turned out quite beautiful.

However, the war has now begun.

As you can see by the photo, he is already plotting how to take down that ornament. A few minutes after I took this photo, this ornament became the first victim, rolling across the floor as Slick tore through the tree. But after that, he calmed down and sat under the tree, not bothering a thing. This was a calculated move to throw me off my guard, of course. You see, he has already set a precedent when it comes to his destruction of Christmas trees.

Last year, I tore my hair out over the damage Slick did to the tree on a daily basis. I would come home from work and half the decorations would be on the floor. I'd put them back, only to wake up the next morning and find them on the floor again. Our solution was to place a door in the doorway to the living room every night so he couldn't even get into the room. We just wedge it in place and though it's cumbersome and heavy, it does the job.

When I put up the door last night, Slick was not pleased. He sat in front of it and stared at it, as though he could, by sheer force of will, blast it to smithereens so that he could go and do his dastardly work. In retaliation for my opening volley, he proceeded to annoy me all night long. He woke me up once by scratching on my daughter's bedroom door. I yelled at him. He woke me up again when he jumped on my dresser and knocked over a bunch of stuff. Another yelling commenced. The third time, he woke me up by jumping on my husband's dresser.

When I stumbled out of bed this morning, bleary-eyed and unhappy, I removed the door to the living room and he ran right over to the tree, as though he heard John Wayne yelling, "Charge!" He began fiddling with ornaments, biting on the tree branches, and dismissing my commands to STOP. At one point, he literally had me running circles under the tree. That's when I said enough and put him in my bedroom, then shut the door.

That's where he's at right now. In short, he's been put in time out, like a naughty toddler.

My other cat, Kathryn, could care less about knocking off ornaments and making my life miserable. She loves to lay under the tree and take a nap.


She also loves to pose for photos.
I do believe, if she could talk, she would say, "Look at me! I'm the good one. I'm also cute."

Let the 2012 Christmas Tree War commence!

26 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. I'm starting to wonder if I should put up a perimeter around the tree... =D

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  2. Elizabeth Parker10:49 AM

    So fun to read this! I laughed out loud.

    Merry Christmas, Melissa!

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    1. Thank you, Betty! Merry Christmas to you, as well!

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  3. ROFL! This was hilarious, although I completely sympathize at the same time. Fortunately, my cats are a little older, and so far, they have not knocked one ornament off!! I think this might be the first year that's happened.

    The tree looks beautiful!!

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    1. I am hoping Slick will grow out of it - but maybe that's just wishful thinking!

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  4. What a funny cat!! :) I love your real tree... we like real trees in our house, too, and just decorated ours today! :)

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    1. We haven't had a real tree since I was pregnant with my daughter - and she's 12 years old! So it was time. :)

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  5. My cat goes a bit crazy when we put up the tree but, luckily, only for a day or so until she gets use to it. But there is a lot of yelling directed her way during that time! Now she is content to just sleep under it and occasionally swipe an ornament or two for attention. She does not seem as obnoxious with it now as she did as a kitten, so I guess that's a plus! I always love the smell of real trees even though mine is a fake. Once I get older and have a family, I like the idea of going out and choosing a real tree or trekking into the forest a la Clark Griswold and his family :-)

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    1. I think we did the Griswold family Christmas tree hunting once when I was young, but we've never done it since we've been married. I may have to try it next year!

      As far as Slick goes, let's just say he's been in time out a LOT today. =D

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  6. Hilarious! Your Slick sounds quite a character. And your tree looks wonderful.

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    1. Thank, J.T.! Oh, I could easily write Slick into a future novel. =D

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  7. Oh those cats are so beautiful!

    And your tree is stunning. Well done!

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    1. Thanks, Kelley! It's a little crooked but that just makes it more special. =D

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  8. I just love that calculated look.....!

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    1. Oh, it's calculated, all right. He had me running circles around that tree yesterday!

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  9. My cat is indifferent to the tree, as she is to everything else except my counters (always popping up on the counter to scrounge for crumbs or left overs. Ack!)

    So I kind of wish Cleo would bother the tree more and the counters less!

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    1. Slick is the same way - he will jump on the counters, into the kitchen sink, into the bathtub, heck, he'll go anywhere! My other cat could care less. LOL

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  10. Hilarious post Melissa! Good luck with your very own war on the home front! From the look on Slick's face I'd say you have your work cut our for you:)

    And your tree is GORGEOUS, by the way!!!

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    1. Thank you, Valerie! He was trying to push my buttons again last night - I think he wanted to climb to the top of the tree! Let's just say I am investing in lots of kitty treats to keep him occupied. Either that, or to make him fat so he can't move as fast. LOL

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  11. Melissa, often lightly spraying a citrus scent will deter cats -- most of them hate the smell of citrus. I can usually manage it so that I don't smell the citrus myself. (You don't want it competing with that wonderful pine scent!)

    We skipped a tree last year because the German Shepherd was still way too young and bouncy, and she goes after anything ball-shaped! But this year we took a chance and she's been wonderful so far. (I'd better not say that too loudly...if she hears me she might decide she has a reputation to uphold!) :-)

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    1. When we had our other cats years ago, I tried the citrus thing and it did not deter them AT ALL. LOL! I might try it with Slick, but he actually is addicted to smells - when I wash my hair, he sticks his nose in it and tries to eat it. When I clean the bathroom, I have to keep the door closed or he will lay on the rug and get high! Yes, he is a BIZARRE cat.

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  12. My parents' cat loves to hide behind their tree; she loves to hide period, but the tree offers better cover, plus this way she can be close to the action, heh heh heh.

    What a gorgeous tree! And some pretty adorable kitties as well.

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    1. I was a little worried this morning when Slick was in a destructive mode, running around and acting unhinged. I may not have a Christmas tree up when I get home!

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  13. Our cats have learned the hard way over the years that if they disturb the tree, they get a nasty spray of vinegar water shot at them. :) The problem I have now is not them knocking ornaments off, but of them chewing and eating the fake pine needles and then finding little vomit patches with the green needles in it. Yuck.

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    1. Vinegar water, eh? I may have to try that!

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