Sunday, August 31, 2014

The View from the Office, i. e. The Bed

When you have a prolonged illness, you tend to think that your current situation is the new normal.

I have a lovely office. Here' s a few pictures of it:

Sadly, because of my mystery ailment, combined with my rheumatoid arthritis, I have a new office: i.e. my bed. And here is the view from it on most days (though the cat pictured may vary as I have three of the little darlings):

I don't like this. My office is a room of creativity and inspiration, and it makes me feel motivated whenever I work in it. But when you're taking painkillers, stairs aren't necessarily a good thing and when you're in pain, stairs aren't necessarily a good thing, either. Also, my office is in the attic and during the summer, it gets rather hot. That's the last thing I need as I continue to be battle hot flashes from menopause.

I sometimes wonder if I will ever return to my version of normal again. Granted, I'm not a healthy person and haven't been for some time. But at least I could work. I could exercise. There were days I could do neither, but they passed, and I would be able to continue.

It's been over a month since this whole medical journey has began. A month. I can hardly wrap my head around it. How is that possible? How can it be that with today's modern medicine, all three of the doctors I've seen have been unable to tell me what's wrong? (I go see a fourth on Wednesday). In the end, I suppose it's because the human body is still a mystery in many ways and medicine is a guessing game. Sometimes, you have definite indicators of a disease or ailment. Other times you have symptoms that don't fit what the medical community has previously observed. So, you wait. And you wait some more. And you deal with the pain the best way you know how. Unfortunately, that's meant a lot of chocolate for me, which, combined with lack of exercise and the whole hormone upheaval caused by menopause, has translated to some weight gain. That is frustrating. But chocolate is one of the ways I cope. It's one of the ways I get through the day. There will come a time when I start really watching how much of it I eat, but for now, I am not very disciplined in that area.

Amazingly enough, I have been able to keep writing during this time - and it's been glorious. I am editing my fifth novel and have enjoyed the process so much. I'm very blessed that lying in bed is conducive to writing instead of other activities, i.e. rock climbing! :D

And that's it for Sunday musings. Now I'm off to work on the novel.


  1. I hope your appointment Wednesday brings some answers. I'll be sending good thoughts your way.

    As for the temporary office, what about bringing down one or two items from your official office for inspiration and motivation? Given the circumstances, the "Keep Calm and Carry On" poster seems fitting--or perhaps some Snoopy to keep the cats company. :-)

    1. Good idea, Ilene! I have plenty of little odds and ends that I could put in my bedroom to help inspire me. :)

      I'm hoping Wednesday brings some answers, too. I am ready to feel better and get back to semi-normal.

  2. I bet the last month feels more like three! It's sure not fun being laid up. Hoping and praying that Wednesday will bring some answers and relief.
    Thank goodness for chocolate and kitties to keep you company and that you can keep writing.

    1. J.T., I can't believe I spent the entire month of August at home. Just unreal. I'm so thankful I've had my kitties to help me through it. They are such great company.

      We'll see what the doctor says tomorrow. Thanks for your good wishes!

  3. I was hospital bound for 2.5 weeks with one pregnancy, and actually loved the first two weeks because I had nearly uninterrupted time to read, relax, write, relax, watch movies... no chores! But then I got depressed starting the third week, and all I did was watch TV and feel sorry for myself. So I can imagine how frustrated you must feel!! Praying you get a prognosis soon and some improvment!

    1. Margo - I'm pretty much the same. First two weeks were wonderful! Actually, I've really enjoyed staying home, but I have started to get a bit depressed. I think if I could work just two days a week and the rest of the time from home, that would be ideal. :)


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