I feel the need to write, to get down some words, no matter how badly, and just feel my fingers move on the keyboard. The recovery process has been agonizingly slow and frustrating. One day I feel decent - the next, not so much. Or I'll feel good for a few hours and then the next three are bad. I suppose it's the nature of recovering from mono, but it does get tiresome.
The worst is not having the motivation to do much of anything - watch movies, read books, write, or even journal. I surf the Internet only because a person needs to do something to keep from going crazy, but I'm even bored with the Internet now.
My cats, thank goodness, accept me and my moods and generally have made this whole process a lot more bearable. There's something about a pet who accepts you unconditionally (well, as long as you feed them!) that makes everything easier.
My eating habits are atrocious, but I've been eating what sounds good and not what is necessarily good for me, leading me to fear that I'm going to gain weight since I've been off my regular eating plan. But the scale keeps going down and this must mean that instead of converting calories to fat, I'm still using all my energy to fight off the mono virus. Despite the weight loss, I still don't think that's a good thing.
We had a terrific rainstorm last night as well as a tornado south of us. Today, it snowed in the western part of Nebraska, but here, in the eastern portion, we had another tornado. It's very odd weather, but not so odd when you consider that Nebraska has always been like that when it comes to weather. But the colder temps are moving in the joints in my body are definitely feeling it.
If this post sounds like it's all a bunch of rambling, well, that's because it is. I've been dealing with this illness for two weeks now, and I still do not feel like I'm anywhere near being over it. I need to get back to work. I need to get back to my life. Yet if I push myself, I will only prolong the recovery process.
Patience. Patience. Patience.
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